At first glance, it’s not hard to figure out if Mars in Virgo is attracted to you. This is the sign of service, so Mars in Virgo will show his or her affection by helping you. Now you have an attentive partner (or potential partner) who will fulfill your every need!
Well, not quite. Ultimately, the helpfulness of Mars in Virgo can turn into hectorism. And in some cases, Virgo just walks out the door. What happened to your attentive lover?
The Evaluation Phase – Draws a Mars in Virgo that you like
Mars in Virgo will basically help almost anyone. But if he likes you, he’ll go out of his way to bring you coffee every morning. Or he’ll fix your computer and upgrade your system while he’s at it.
You may not pay much attention to him at first. But rest assured, he noticed you. You can ask for help and he will be happy to help you. The real test is whether he volunteers his services. When he gets your coffee/fixes your computer, everything is tailor-made for you. Your coffee will be the perfect mix of one and a half sugars with soy milk and a dash of vanilla syrup. Your computer will run better than ever because it has adapted its system configurations to your usage patterns. If he likes you, he already knows exactly what it takes to make your day go smoothly.
Know what they want
Mars in Virgo is somewhat shy and special. She already knows who she wants. Is it you? You can ask her out, and if she isn’t interested, she will be extremely polite. But the date will never happen. If she is interested, she will say yes without hesitation. When you are out together, she will be friendly and charmingly modest.
But there’s nothing in the bag yet. You’re still in the evaluation phase, because she doesn’t just select anyone as her partner. She will take copious mental notes. At this stage you can mess things up by being loud, rude, or messy (she despises these qualities). If you offend her, this will be your last date. But even if you pass with flying colors, physical contact will likely be kept to a minimum since she’s not big on PDAs.
What she will do is ask you a lot of questions. Virgo is ruled by Mercury, and Mars in Virgo shows its interest by gathering information about you.
The upgrade phase
You’re past the evaluation phase, but don’t expect Mars in Virgo to jump into bed right away. He will want to take his time, and there is a reason for that. Although he is likely to be a skilled lover (it’s important that this perfectionist sign is a master at whatever he does), he will be self-critical. It will take a while before he feels comfortable enough to expose his ‘flaws’.
Chances are his perceived flaws will be minimal because his perfectionism extends to health, grooming, etc. But his standards will be several steps higher than others, meaning he will magnify everything about himself that isn’t just so is. He wants to make sure you don’t recoil in horror. If you insist on intimacy before he’s ready, he’ll pull away.
Mars in Virgo is an earth sign, so he can be quite sensual, but that will always be in line with his awareness of what could go wrong and what he could do better. He will do everything he can to make you happy in the bedroom, sometimes to the exclusion of his happiness. If you suspect a hint of sacrifice in his approach to sex, you’re right; no matter how well adjusted he is, Mars in Virgo will show a touch of masochism. It can be subtle or full-blown, and it will emerge after you’ve been together for a while.
The other thing to understand about Mars in Virgo is that she will be obsessive about one or more areas of her life. She may or may not be a neat freak, but she will have a method of doing something (in and out of the bedroom) that it should not be tampered with. You’ll think, “It won’t matter if I let this slide, or do this differently than she told me to.” You will find that you have made a serious mistake. Although she is a mutable sign and wants change (more on that later), she can be as fixated as a Taurus about her routines. For Mars in Virgo, control is the path to correctness, and correctness is Virgo Nirvana.
Passion for improvement
Which brings us to Mars in Virgo’s passion for improvement. He sees what can be solved and therefore his helpfulness will express itself in criticism. He’s not trying to tear you down, he just sees what you could do better. What he really wants is for the two of you to get better together.
Even if you think you’re just fine the way you are, Mars in Virgo will be surprisingly ambitious. He will want to continue to make progress, whether it be ways to eat healthy, or improved approaches to time management/emotional awareness/financial mastery. If you’re the quiet type who is content to marinate things as they are, this will be a major sticking point between you. Remember, Mars chose Virgo you, and it wasn’t an accidental decision. He saw someone who could meet his standards and grow with him.
But let’s say you’re not interested in growing. Or you benefit from Mars in Virgo’s services (she will continue to do her utmost for you) without giving anything in return. She doesn’t like confrontation (which is messy), so she may not immediately say there are problems. She will hold out for a while because giving up is undisciplined. But when she stops giving you suggestions about what you could fix, or when she starts excluding you from her latest self-improvement program, you know there are problems.
If she’s a particularly manipulative Virgo, she’ll set an impossible milestone for you. Suddenly it becomes crucial that you meditate for an hour every day and at the same time embrace a vegan lifestyle (while you have always eaten meat). Or she’ll say it’s her and not you, using her self-critical tactics as a weapon. The end will come quietly. In typical, understated Virgo fashion, she just walks out the door.
